Nursery Miracle!

I made a Nursery Ministry sign up sheet to get some much needed help in our Nursery. (See previous "Nursery Blues" post). To give an idea, we have Nursery available, Sunday morning, Sunday evening, Wednesday evening, and every other Thursday afternoon. During each of these we have had one worker, and that would be this Pastor's wife.
I've heard that the Pastor's wife is the most unchurched person in the church. This certainly has been true in my case. It had been almost two years since I had attended a service and I could feel burnout coming. I wasn't sure how much longer I could endure.
So I did the only thing I could, and asked for help! So simple, so easy, so obvious...unfortunately, not for this CONTROL FREAK! When I got the sign up sheet back and I saw it filled up with signatures, I was thrilled and I was rebuked. Thrilled because we got enough signatures for a monthly rotation, plus one helper and one substitute! Do you know what else, my name isn't even on the rotation!
I was rebuked because I wonder how God can have so much patience with this child of His? All of my whining, crying and, "poor me," attitude. All of the blessings I missed out on because I thought I was in control. My hope lost, my vision cut off, because it became all about me. But my Lord is gracious to me, even when I forget about His plan and follow mine instead. So, go ahead and call me a, "control freak," please, I've certainly earned it!