Thursday, May 10, 2007

Is it a Ministry When...

It's one of those times when I don't know why things happen the way they do. I can't see the full picture, and whatever God is doing is a mystery. I am without an explanation or an answer.
We had a special Ladies Luncheon this afternoon. I am the Nursery worker during our Ladies Group meetings. Today was no exception. I had been told by some other mom's, that they would be attending the Luncheon, and that they would be bringing their children to the nursery. So I was ready. Because the meeting was right in the middle of nap time, the kids took an early nap so that they wouldn't be cranky. I packed a lunch for them to eat away from home. I prepared the Nursery with snacks and supplies, and plans for fun.
But, no one came. We waited for a while, and after about 20 minutes, I was pretty sure that Nursery was just going to be me and my kids...and it was. For two hours, my kids had snacks and played alone.
This thought, that I know is not from God, kept creeping into my mind, "why are we even here? It would be so much easier if we were doing all this at home right now." I know the Lord wants me to be faithful, and a good example to my children. He never did say that it would be easy all the time. But, I came and went from Nursery today without really connecting to anyone else, having no fellowship, and I wasn't even able to be of service to anyone. I left church feeling like my time and my energy were a waste. Usually, I leave Nursery tired, but a good tired. I know that my ministry is valuable, and that it allows other moms to be fed spiritually. It's a good feeling, knowing that what I'm doing makes a difference.
On days like today however, I just don't get much satisfaction at all.

1 comment:

Julo said...

Oh, have I been there. When we were in seminary we drove an hour to church and I was the Sunday School teacher for all the kids under 3rd grade (including any babies and toddlers). There were some days that we went all the way down there and I had no other kids but mine. It's hard. It's good to know that our reward will be in heaven.